Infographic: Why Do People Swipe Right (or Left) on Tinder. 180+ Positive Affirmations For Kids To Boost Motivation And Confidence I like my thoughts how I like my whiskey, always glass half full., 11. When life closes a door, just open it again. Your mind will naturally focus more on the positive things that happen that day rather than the negatives. I dont know how to act my age because Ive never been this old before. Share them with your friends and colleagues and make them smile too. 192. 181. Because he was always spotted. 1. 45 Self-Compassion Affirmations to Practice when Feeling Low. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. You never know what you have, until you clean your closet. 39 Funny Positive Affirmations [Feel Happier Instantly] 3. Are these genes in your jeans or are you just happy to see me? 185. 52. 18 Funny Positive Affirmations to Get Through Your Shitty Day The most important thing to remember when using positive affirmations is that it is all about how you feel. 114. People only rain on my parade because they are jealous of my sun and tired of their shade., 14. 100+ weird quotes that make no sense at all but are funny Find a short calm and peaceful moment in your day and use it for setting your mindset up for happiness. 167. 300+ Short Positive Quotes to Brighten Your Day - PsyCat Games Some when they enter, others when they leave. Giving up on your goal because of one setback is like slashing your other three tires because you got a flat., 6. 201. Work smarter, not for owning iPhones, but for not fearing their breaks., 3. - Unknown. Im not here to judge, Im just pointing out all the mistakes youre making. I am joyful for achieving the ones I did. Your actions become your habits. 223. I wish my wallet came with free refills. You can also share them with your co-workers to put a smile on their faces. Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when Im with you. Envelope. 56. You wanna know who Im in love with? Alexa, please clean the negativity off of my mind please., 4. Can February march? We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack. The thing is, Im still getting ready. Not me, but somebody does. Happiness is a choice. But then again so does . Just as importantly, you can benefit from laughter in everyday situations. Laughter keeps us from taking life too seriously, and life certainly does everything it can to ensure that we take it too seriously. 184. Waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn, hardest thing in the world. Its time to be much more intentional about the words that we tell ourselves and take a step back from all of lifes noise. The early bird catches the worm, eats more and dies sooner. 165. 3. "It's going to be hard, but hard does not mean impossible.". 198. If you dont succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried. Helen Giangregorio. 39. Walking into a room and then forgetting why I am here is my daily cardio. Not saying I hate you, but if your face was on fire and I had a glass of water, Id drink it. To thrive in life you need three bones. Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. Smile today, tomorrow could be worse. Your email address will not be published. Lifes biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I dont want to get out of bed. 1. All you need is love. Shoot for the moon. How do you count cows? You may think youll never get over it, but you will, and youll be fine., 7. 5. Be Funny Positive Affirmations These funny ideas are smart and a bit sarcastic and will bring a smile to your face. No matter how bad it gets, Im always rich when I go to the dollar store. 237. Positive Affirmations And Inspiring Quotes About Life Life is filled with highs and lows, sometimes, we need some inspirational quotes to help us overcome challenges of life and offer guidance to us. Being funny increase people's tendency to connect with you and talk to you. Funny Positive Affirmations For Work. The Only 100 Positive Affirmations You Will Ever Need I put my phone in airplane mode, but its not flying. Since not all of us are blessed with the ability to throw a joke the right way, we thought of helping you out by giving you these ridiculously short funny quotes. I make the right choices every time. A perfectly executed joke, said at a right time and at a right place, can change an awkward situation into a comfortable one. If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito. Betty Reese, 9. 64. My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. 123. 105. I am enough. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. 6. Top 10 Funny Affirmations For Self-Esteem, Funny Daily Affirmations To Boost Your Energy, Funny Positive Affirmations For Confidence, 90 Funny Affirmations To Start Your Day With Laughter, 90 Inspiring & Funny Quotes About Ageing Gracefully, 280 Positive Money Affirmations For An Abundance Mindset. I wish my wallet came with free refills. Bill Murray I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldnt complain. Always remember youre unique, just like everyone else. Affirmations are a powerful tool to overcome self-sabotaging thoughts and boost your self-esteem. Wake up and smell the birdshit on your windshield. What is the tallest building in the entire world? 258+ Funny & Happy Friday Quotes To Explode Your Energy Run. Maybe Monday doesn't like you either. 186. 100 Funny Monday Quotes and Sayings - Inside Of Happiness Those who snore always fall asleep first. INSPIRATIONAL positive mindset affirmation #shorts #short #shortvideo 71. 213. 264. 262. 121. Life begins on Friday night. 169. Those who snore always fall asleep first. 232. Learn sign language, its very handy. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. 72. I thought you said extra fries. My windows arent dirty, my dog is painting. 93. Every time you are able to find some humor in a difficult situation, you win., 5. I have Alzheimers bulimia, first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. Short Positive Affirmations - 110 Powerful Affirmations - Mindbless 143. 58. I am lazy till I get a motive. My imaginary friend thinks he has problems. I will create my own magic like my name is J. K. Rowling. I never apologize. 164. Once you're feeling happy and confident about your sense of humor, use these 35 affirmations to navigate challenging situations with a smile. I'm Sergios Rotar, a 21 years old personal development enthusiast. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. 229. 113. I bet giraffes dont even know what farts smell like. Chris Rock 43. 191. Best friends eat your food. I am so worthy so that I am filling the life of people with fun and joy. 125. I see the funny side of life more and more. When and How to Let Them Know, How To Cheer Yourself Up When Feeling Down, 5 Things To Discuss With Your Partner Before Marriage, Funny Positive Affirmations For Self-Esteem, 50+ Powerful Positive Affirmations For Exams, 70+ Positive Affirmations For Teens From Parents. Youll probably grin or laugh if you say these affirmations aloud, thinking youre crazy. They log in. Use this space for describing your block. I didnt want to interrupt her. Some people are like clouds. Im going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, Im outstanding. 174. If everyone knew what I was thinking, I would get punched in the face a lot. If I want a squirrel to like me, I guess I gotta act like a nut. If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldnt have a job if he was any smarter. John Gotti, 6. 277. Smiles are contagious, be a carrier. I dont think thats a coincidence. 102. 235. 150. You might undoubtedly relate with them, and yet you will not feel laid back because of your weaknesses. If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? Emphasis on the cool. My diet for today: 1% food, 99% Halloween candy. But sometimes affirmations may not work. 97. 85 Funny Wednesday Quotes, Sayings, Pics, and Images - The Random Vibez Waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn, hardest thing in the world. I am constantly growing and improving. If Cinderellas shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off? If at first, you dont succeed, so much for skydiving. 28. Everyone brings happiness to this office. avoid carbs. When life gives you melons, you could be dyslexic. So, watch your words, restructure your thoughts, and stay positive if you want to see a change in your life. We all have those days when we feel like the world is coming to an end. Your email address will not be published. When you fall, I will be there to catch you with love. Funny Friday Quotes. A backbone. Of course, I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice. Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. 8. Ill keep going forward even if my pants tear off. Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but Im still going to keep looking. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now thats confusing. 1. 90 Funny Affirmations To Start Your Day With Laughter (2023) If you dont succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried. I am adventurous. 28. Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but Im still going to keep looking. You can use affirmations to alleviate pressure in highly stressful scenarios, like taking an exam or going to a job interview. Pardon me, I have 6 pounds of boneless mass to get rid of. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle. 16. 112. 8. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wifes mother. Being funny seems to be taking less effort. To anybody I hurt this year, I just wanna say you deserve it. I did not trip and fall. 274. 202. Henny Youngman 265. My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. I am already great, and I am yet to reach my full potential. Steve Martin 1,132 Positive Affirmations: Your Daily List of - Develop Good Habits 156. Im amusing and make the people around me happy. Today, I choose to put on my positive pants. Because someone is always sitting on the deck. Your eyes water when you yawn, because you miss your bed and it makes you sad. Nine out of ten people love chocolate, and the 10th person is always lying. Its scary when it disappears. Oh sheet! Sincerely, the floor. Stressed spelled backward is desserts. 82. Today I was a hero. I will never let anyone treat me like a yellow starburst. If you cant laugh at your own problems, call me and Ill laugh at them. Smiles are contagious, be a carrier. Use them throughout the day whenever you experience negative thoughts. Dont worry, the spider is smaller than you. The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep. A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Mind blown! I dont need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. "In life only one thing is certain, Friday will come.". 154. When shit hits the fan at work, I turn it into fertilizer. We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack. I only check my voicemail to get rid of the annoying little icon. I love my body. Roy Lichtenstein Chris Rock, 256. Im lovely because everyone likes me more than Monday morning!, 7. 1. Marriage is like a walk in the park, Jurassic Park. Im not lazy, Im on power saving mode. Friends buy you food. Not only can laughter improve our problem-solving skills, but it can also help battle various diseases. Im not arguing, Im just telling you why youre wrong. I should have theme music every time I enter a room. 116. If you cant remember my name, just say chocolate and Ill turn around.. 273. 51. Enjoying this list of funny affirmations so far? No one is immune to self-sabotage, heartbreak, loss, and failure. Sorry, I didnt pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. - George Burns. 149. Whether its at other people or at ourselves, its good to laugh in life. I crack the right joke at the perfect moment. Dear universe, Im totally open to all of the amazing things coming my way., See also: 120 Best Spiritual Universe Quotes To Contemplate Life. I am the sunshine even when its gloomy outside. 278. 220. Funny Affirmations. Be like a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet from inside. Work smarter, not for owning iPhones, but for not fearing their breaks. 69 Funny Affirmations To Lighten Up Your Mood 65. What happens to a frogs car when it breaks down? 236. I am grateful for that time. A gummy bear. I wasnt mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if Im mad.. yes, Im mad! Its scary when it disappears. happy. Im not here to judge, Im just pointing out all the mistakes youre making. Affirmations can either be written down, spoken out loud, or visualized in the form of a conversation between money and you. 160. And no, that's definitely not a bad thing! 163. 20 Funny Positive Affirmations for Self-Esteem 169. They shape our present and have an impact on our future. Why is England the wettest country? There are endless opportunities. I bet giraffes dont even know what farts smell like. I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. I am confused between what I like the most hanging out or posting that I hung out. I dont have everything I want, but I have all I need. 2. Start your day on a positive and lighter note with these funny daily affirmations and quotes to get you through. 60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes to Laugh About - Wealthy Gorilla Even if youre a skeptic, you must admit these funny affirmations really work. 75. I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Just like every Monday does on Earth. 200+ Funny Life Quotes Dripping With Sarcasm And Wit - Scary Mommy I will not let my mind be a bully to my body. "Age is of no importance unless you're a cheese.". 271. I live in a loving, nurturing, safe, and beautiful world. Wouldnt exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place, the fridge. 65 Funny Positive Affirmations That Work For Everyone - ThediaryforLife Consider what you want to accomplish using these witty affirmations, and go for the ones that will bring you closer to that goal. Life is a game full of little and big surprises. East 50 Funny Affirmations for a Daily Dose of Humor - Happier Human This is a snap. Excuse me, I need to go be awesome today. 68. "After 30, a body has a mind of its own.". 1. This is the beauty of funny affirmations. Swimming trunks. I am thankful for all those difficult people in my life. Some people are like clouds. 130. Funny Affirmation Quotes - ShortQuotes.cc If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. 195. Not everyone has good taste. 9. Albert Einstein I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays. Be strong, I whispered to my WiFi signal. I didnt mean to push all your buttons, I was just looking for the mute button. Stop texting me in the middle of texting you, now I have to change my text. My farts aren't nearly as bad as my dogs'. 272.
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